Well its been an odd week so far, it seemed to start out fine but then it turn rather dark and it seems I have been sailing stormy waters since. While I have lots to do before my baby shower takes way tomorrow, it was somewhat sunny enough to go to the beach - not warm enough to go swimming or anything but a nice drive out and walk along the beach...bit of one on one time, and daddy daughter bonding given we are 5.5wks off our little girl making her grand entrance into the world.
I headed over and picked Simon up and we went for a drive out to Maraetai Beach, I havent been there for well over 10yrs, actually a little less now that I think about it, I went there for one of my ex best friend's 18th birthday about 5yrs ago. We drove around a bit and found a little parking area where we parked up and went and played on the playground like big kids.....sadly they are the most strangest swings there and well big fat preggo me couldnt get into the swing....Simon took great job out of photographing my attemps of getting into the swing then trying to get back out of it...we had a little go on the slide, I almost got stuck....and played on a few other things...seemed pregnancy isnt very friendly when it comes to play grounds...!! But the photos were cute and funny.
We walked along the beach as the sun was slightly setting then walked down alone a peir where we sat cuddled up, Simon sitting behind me with his hands protectively on my belly...head nuzzled into my hair and neck. His little girl was moving around a little bit...it always gives me a great feeling when he gets to feel her moving or has the hiccups. We took some photos of our hands on my belly and a few other pics of each other.
It was such a nice little late afternoon trip - only when we headed back home did it all fall to pieces and into tears. And it was such an event that I was almighty lucky I didnt go into premature labour, but it has left me rather upset and making me think some not so nice thoughts....but also thinking other things.....and in all honestly I have no shame in saying what happened - and this person you may be family and related to me via MY daughter, but there is NO way you can make me shut up, freedom of speech. Im well aware you yourself are probably reading this, or you have friends and family back home in the UK reading my blog, spying on me....but you have really well and truely changed my mind on what I thought of you...you make things just a little bit more clearer to me about what kind of person you really are.
I repsected you, I opened my home to you, and what do you give me?? Absolutely nothing, you have made me feel unwelcomed and unwanted and not only me but mine and your SON's daughter too - your own GRANDAUGHTER..! You wonder why I left when I did? It was because of you, you were one of the biggest factors in me leaving almost 6 months ago....because of how you made me feel. Having me around felt like I was a big inconveneince to you. Your entitled to your opinion, but obviously truth hurts for you to see it put out in front of you - I will NEVER forgive you for what you said to me, and how you almost endangered your grandaughter's life. Not only did you hurt me, but you hurt your son too... but you also have cost your relationship with you grandaughter now. I dont think you love her, let alone want her, and because of that I dont think you should be allowed to see her - left alone with her. But then having cut yourself off from most of your family would that really bother you much? Or are you just happy again that you have undone all the hard work that me and your son have worked hard on rebuilding and sorting out. On the bonding and relationship I have been trying to get him to form with his daughter before she is born....trying to make OUR family work out.
Because of what you have said and done towards me - you have also distroyed the relationship your SON had with his DAUGHTER...! You clearly dont want to see him happy or taken away from you, but now you have gone and forced him pretty much well and truely away from me but most of all his daughter and because I that I will NEVER forgive you. I hate the way you make me feel, I hate men like you who belittle woman and treat them like a piece of dirty especially pregnant woman so close to giving birth....!
BUT maybe you havent learnt one thing about me - I have Northern Irish blood running through my viens (as does your grandaughter), and I know how much you HATE them, but we dont give up without a fight... I dont give up without a fight....I also have German blood just like you too, and I am the grandaughter of a WW2 war veteran. I WILL fight for my family....and that family includes your son who the father of my daughter..!! You will find yourself very lonely one day when you have pushed away all of your family and those you love.
Well its been an odd week so far, it seemed to start out fine but then it turn rather dark and it seems I have been sailing stormy waters since. While I have lots to do before my baby shower takes way tomorrow, it was somewhat sunny enough to go to the beach - not warm enough to go swimming or anything but a nice drive out and walk along the beach...bit of one on one time, and daddy daughter bonding given we are 5.5wks off our little girl making her grand entrance into the world.
I headed over and picked Simon up and we went for a drive out to Maraetai Beach, I havent been there for well over 10yrs, actually a little less now that I think about it, I went there for one of my ex best friend's 18th birthday about 5yrs ago. We drove around a bit and found a little parking area where we parked up and went and played on the playground like big kids.....sadly they are the most strangest swings there and well big fat preggo me couldnt get into the swing....Simon took great job out of photographing my attemps of getting into the swing then trying to get back out of it...we had a little go on the slide, I almost got stuck....and played on a few other things...seemed pregnancy isnt very friendly when it comes to play grounds...!! But the photos were cute and funny.
We walked along the beach as the sun was slightly setting then walked down alone a peir where we sat cuddled up, Simon sitting behind me with his hands protectively on my belly...head nuzzled into my hair and neck. His little girl was moving around a little bit...it always gives me a great feeling when he gets to feel her moving or has the hiccups. We took some photos of our hands on my belly and a few other pics of each other. 
It was such a nice little late afternoon trip - only when we headed back home did it all fall to pieces and into tears. And it was such an event that I was almighty lucky I didnt go into premature labour, but it has left me rather upset and making me think some not so nice thoughts....but also thinking other things.....and in all honestly I have no shame in saying what happened - and this person you may be family and related to me via MY daughter, but there is NO way you can make me shut up, freedom of speech. Im well aware you yourself are probably reading this, or you have friends and family back home in the UK reading my blog, spying on me....but you have really well and truely changed my mind on what I thought of you...you make things just a little bit more clearer to me about what kind of person you really are. 
I repsected you, I opened my home to you, and what do you give me?? Absolutely nothing, you have made me feel unwelcomed and unwanted and not only me but mine and your SON's daughter too - your own GRANDAUGHTER..! You wonder why I left when I did? It was because of you, you were one of the biggest factors in me leaving almost 6 months ago....because of how you made me feel. Having me around felt like I was a big inconveneince to you. Your entitled to your opinion, but obviously truth hurts for you to see it put out in front of you - I will NEVER forgive you for what you said to me, and how you almost endangered your grandaughter's life. Not only did you hurt me, but you hurt your son too... but you also have cost your relationship with you grandaughter now. I dont think you love her, let alone want her, and because of that I dont think you should be allowed to see her - left alone with her. But then having cut yourself off from most of your family would that really bother you much? Or are you just happy again that you have undone all the hard work that me and your son have worked hard on rebuilding and sorting out. On the bonding and relationship I have been trying to get him to form with his daughter before she is born....trying to make OUR family work out. 
Because of what you have said and done towards me - you have also distroyed the relationship your SON had with his DAUGHTER...! You clearly dont want to see him happy or taken away from you, but now you have gone and forced him pretty much well and truely away from me but most of all his daughter and because I that I will NEVER forgive you. I hate the way you make me feel, I hate men like you who belittle woman and treat them like a piece of dirty especially pregnant woman so close to giving birth....! 
BUT maybe you havent learnt one thing about me - I have Northern Irish blood running through my viens (as does your grandaughter), and I know how much you HATE them, but we dont give up without a fight... I dont give up without a fight....I also have German blood just like you too, and I am the grandaughter of a WW2 war veteran. I WILL fight for my family....and that family includes your son who the father of my daughter..!! You will find yourself very lonely one day when you have pushed away all of your family and those you love. 
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