Pregnancy Dreams

Ive discovered over the past 5months that pegnancy has alot of dreams with it that are just way of out it in some parts and in other parts well and truely reflect how your personally are feeling deep down inside. Those fears you have but are trying to hide so very well from coming to be real.

Ive had dreams about celebs, like for example being in a helicopter and forgetting my socks and Simon Gault (who is an amazing chef that I am fortunate enough to have met a few times and owns an awesome restaurant on Auckland's vidacut) bringing me a pair of my socks - and they were infact a pair of socks I actually do own and have been in the back of my sock drawer for a while. Ive had dreams about childhood friends that Ive not seen in YEARS and Im back at school....then you have other dreams which are on the errm kinky level - I had a somewhat inappropriate dream of Prince William the night of his wedding after watching that on TV....!! LOL

Then you have the dreams that are nightmares, the ones where you are so tired that you force yourself to wake up from them and struggle to get rid of them when you close your eyes again. I had one the other night about my niece Meggan, where she had some unknown virus/illness that was spreading around people killing them and she decided that she didnt want to be resusitated, I told her she was a selfish little girl, and I left her in this motel room - upon looking through the key hole I saw her vomit and dying.....that really scared me and still does. There are alot of nightmares about people I know and love dying and being killed.

Then finally you have the dreams that reflect your own feelings and how you feel in everyday life. I had a dream about how I had my daughter though at the time the gender was unknown in the dream as well as in real life - where someone was trying to take her away from me as I wasnt able to feed her, I didnt get shown at all and didnt know how to breastfeed and so she was taken away from me - breastfeeding is a HUGE fear of mine, I want to do it as it is one of the best things I can supply to my baby to give her the best start to life and the protection and immunity against alot of illnesses, however there are memories surround the act from her father and I fear that she will do the same thing as him, and I will have the same thing happen to my poor boobs that I battled with in our relationship..! I knew that the dream was about my own self consious feelings but what I didnt realise at the time with her being removed from me completely was actually something that her father had decided he would be doing in real life. Taking her away from me to be raised by him and some other woman. I have had dreams where I am going into labour on my own, and giving birth on my own in strange places, this too is another fear of mine given that my daughter's father has now decided he doesnt want to be involved with our daughter's life while she is growing and developing. And I fear greatly that I will be on my own giving birth. Then there is the dream of me having given birth and having Simon walking into the delivery room late and missing his daughter's birth, freaking out over things, and our daughter screaming her head off at him when he attempted to hold her. Yet another fear, that because things to do with my pregnancy and the appointments and birthing classes he needs to be at is not suitable for him and his mistress, he wont have that bond with our daughter while she is in the womb.

I didnt enjoy my first trimester - and the second trimester which is getting close to coming to an end, the ONE trimester they say is meant to be the easy cruisey safe trimester has been hell and Ive not enjoyed it one bit. I fear my final trimster and pending motherhood. Most of all I fear that I am going to have a traumatic birth and that something is going to go wrong since everything else has and not a single positive thing as come out of being pregnant so far.