Tuesday, 30 December 2008
Scrap Space Clean Up (vids)
These are a couple of videos Ive made for the scrap space Challenge of Angela's on Fiskateers...Im pleased with my progress so far!
I should go through some more of the boxes from our girls bedrooms under the desk - I may just find my missing photos or negatives of my friend Sam whom I knew in primary school...Ive been hunting for them since I learnt of his death early on this year.
Ive got lots of photos I need to print out and pages to make - and pages still to finish - but all in good time I will get them done. Ive also got some paper I need to give to Rob...that or maybe I will make some pages from them and give them to him....I have photos for on them...but I know how talented you are at scrapbooking!! So it would be more fun for you to do them...but then I think how busy you are with your job and before long Iggly Piggly will be here...!
Fresh Produce....yummo!
Theres a new fruit and vege shop open up the road - and I struggle to find GOOD produce that is FRESH and a good price...and of decent size and protions and what not....and I use to always look for this when I was doing the stock shopping for the cafe I worked at couple of years ago....I always loved doing the shopping...I knew just what to look for....colour, size, smell, texture and PRICE...there would be days when I would be given money and I wouldnt have enough so paid out of my own pocket...not because I didnt buy what wasnt on the list but because I was consious about the choices I made and what I was cooking with and giving to my customers to consume.
So yes, went to this new place...the lighting was bad its was flicking and your tripping out from the lights in there - they had things really cheap which is cool...but some things werent good like their tomatoes were over ripe, as were their advocados, and their lettuce was a bit maingy...so I by passed those and brought a few things...I did however run into my good friend who is my fab hairdresser - Bex...loves her to bits I do...it was her first time there too and we were talking about healthy eating and stuff...lol it was great fun....had to crack up that Kewpie got out of the car and came running into the store - I picked Kewpie back up and return the puppy to the car...where little Pinkie was laxing back with her other big puppy...
From here I went to another fruit and vege shop to get more veges - can you guess Im making a salad?? Lol...and my salad needs lots of flavour and colour in it! And variety!! Got my shopping then headed to the supermarket to get some stuff to make a cheesecake...and to get Abby some more food and bones...
Speaking of Abby - Im still yet to find one of her fave toys - the Pink Squeaky Bone....I think I got one the same for Betsy last year also...
Well Im off to make my salad....
So yes, went to this new place...the lighting was bad its was flicking and your tripping out from the lights in there - they had things really cheap which is cool...but some things werent good like their tomatoes were over ripe, as were their advocados, and their lettuce was a bit maingy...so I by passed those and brought a few things...I did however run into my good friend who is my fab hairdresser - Bex...loves her to bits I do...it was her first time there too and we were talking about healthy eating and stuff...lol it was great fun....had to crack up that Kewpie got out of the car and came running into the store - I picked Kewpie back up and return the puppy to the car...where little Pinkie was laxing back with her other big puppy...
From here I went to another fruit and vege shop to get more veges - can you guess Im making a salad?? Lol...and my salad needs lots of flavour and colour in it! And variety!! Got my shopping then headed to the supermarket to get some stuff to make a cheesecake...and to get Abby some more food and bones...
Speaking of Abby - Im still yet to find one of her fave toys - the Pink Squeaky Bone....I think I got one the same for Betsy last year also...
Well Im off to make my salad....
Monday, 29 December 2008
A small Message
Remember this tee shirt you had Robbie?? I was holding Rolly in Mom and Dad's kitchen and you came out with it on and camo cargo pants on back in August 04. Hows that for memories? Lol! 'To The Trade Me member and if your a Fiskateer Member too who is posting anno comments on my blog - how about YOU grow up and get a life....if you dont like what is on my blog DONT READ IT!! Its pretty simple you know - but perhaps you dont know how to keep away....you get your little kicks out of reading my blogs, and making up bullshit lies and gossip....you lead a very BORING life...dont you get bored with your little game??
Boy I would love to spend my day's on my backside on the internet reading forums after forums....but I sadly dont have that opportunity to survive free loading off everyone. I have a job and I spend my time that I dont have work training new staff members looking after such WONDERFUL and AWESOME customers - at University....to advance and propel myself even further in my career - becuase I love the industry I work in....there is not a min of the day at work where I sit bumming around on my backside....infact I dont even get to sit down at work....not even for 10 mins let alone 6 hours! Because my job is very active...and may I say who needs a gym membership I have tone and worked off kilos in weeks of being at my job! ITS FUCKING FANTASTIC!!
I know who you are - I wont name and shame you though....hahahahaha you give enough clues in your stupid anno comments that get rejected anyway - cant show your face can you?? Your to ashamed for people to see what a low life you really are. If you enjoy your acting so much...go get a job in theatre and production....Im sure you will pull that off fine and dandy sweetheart...Go stalk someone else....I dont need people like you around me...
I'll have you know - not a day goes by where Im not thinking of my one of Best Friends who's son died at 5 months of age - I will never forget watching his tiny white coffin going into the ground and then helping shovel the dirt on top of it right up until everyone had left.....of another one of my Best Friends who has lost three babies unvito....of another Best Friend who's baby hasnt even taken their first breath and may not get to....or my Uncle whom I didnt get to met as he was stillborn...of my neighbour who's grandson was stillborn also...
GET OVER YOURSELF....I know you cant accept that things dont go YOUR way....you think you can pull me down...make me weak...your so fucking wrong....infact I have to laugh at your immature behaviour that after how many months you still keep up... *rolls eyes* Go make your stupid little threads on Trade Me with your friends who are the same as you...
I do love though - how you can bitch about me and be all nasty - but have you realised what a hypocrit and how discrimnating you are to your friends who have had similar or the same things happen to them? Working in Mental Health you say?? Then you should bloody know BETTER than to discriminate against people who have Mental Illness' - have you forgotten which of your friends battles a mental illness - which ones of your friends have had miscarraiges themselves....
FUCK OFF AND LEAVE ME ALONE! You started this shit - I walked away the next day....and you cant handle that...
This is a note to ANYONE who is reading my blog...be I know you or not....my comments are monitored for a reason...this is my blog...I dont care what you think....thats not my problem...you dont like it - dont keep coming back....its pretty simple - I am well aware how the human mind is curious and has to keep coming back for more but in your addiction for such a thing in all honesty you need to control it and just dont come back...simple yes?? Yes thats right...
I wont take shit from ANYONE...I dont hold grudges....I dont hate people...those who hurt me and beat the crap out of me and disrespect me dont get given the time of day from me anymore....its a simple cutting of ties....and walking away - those people were not real friends to start with.
I follow a rule - and believe it in it strongly. I have a wise elder tell me this while I was growing up through my schooling - People come into your life for a reason and leave it for a reason...sometimes they can be for a short time others for a long time....you may not know it at the time, but they all have lessons they teach you.
I also follow what Roberto's late Great Granmother from Italy told him which he passed onto me - you can count your true best friends on your hand, one will be your mother fore no matter what she will aways be there, the others are those who even at the age of 80 you can say they were there for you and are your best friends...
With that - I bid you all a good day and fabo week....
Love and light
Tiding up my scrapbook room
So Lead Fiskaterr Angela #009 - seriously I swear its like giving your car rego with our numbers....to my knowledge out of the 5000+ members I am the only Bronwyn!
ANYWAY - Lead Fiskateer Angela set a challenge for us to tidy up our scrap staces by New Years Eve - though with me being a day ahead that translates into New Years Day for me....but to keep to tradition of the challenge it looks like i have two days to do this in! Part of the challenge is to go through our stash and create a stash off goodies to give to charity, RAKs or something else I cant think off the top of my head....so far Ive only taken all my stuff out to my room and moved one of the shevling units in the room to a different wall....however these are the before photos...
Please note - this use to be my dad's workshop and he is an Avionics Engineer and Radio HAM - so I have alot of his old shelving units and come across the road arial or so stashed behind a unit or something odd of his - plans and strange drawings that one would think my dad was involved with communicating with Aliens....! He also works for Air New Zealand which explains why there are still alot of AirNZ stickers, planes and cockpit photos on the door lol...
But since Dad left it also became a storage area - of course half of it is from my room when I got a new bed and stuff....others is baby clothes of my nieces and yea....list goes on...
These are your BEFORE photos....keep looking for the updated photos!
My work space of my room..
ANYWAY - Lead Fiskateer Angela set a challenge for us to tidy up our scrap staces by New Years Eve - though with me being a day ahead that translates into New Years Day for me....but to keep to tradition of the challenge it looks like i have two days to do this in! Part of the challenge is to go through our stash and create a stash off goodies to give to charity, RAKs or something else I cant think off the top of my head....so far Ive only taken all my stuff out to my room and moved one of the shevling units in the room to a different wall....however these are the before photos...
Please note - this use to be my dad's workshop and he is an Avionics Engineer and Radio HAM - so I have alot of his old shelving units and come across the road arial or so stashed behind a unit or something odd of his - plans and strange drawings that one would think my dad was involved with communicating with Aliens....! He also works for Air New Zealand which explains why there are still alot of AirNZ stickers, planes and cockpit photos on the door lol...
But since Dad left it also became a storage area - of course half of it is from my room when I got a new bed and stuff....others is baby clothes of my nieces and yea....list goes on...
These are your BEFORE photos....keep looking for the updated photos!
My stash - it all needs to go back out to the room
One half...of my room
My work space of my room..
Thank God Xmas is over!!
Im so glad that Xmas is over now....its never an enjoyable time of the year for me now.....my sister is partly to blame for that. Ok I love my nephew yea, except right now Im not in the mood being around him with his behaviour and all....but I dont give a rats arse about his birthday being on Xmas day!! Its not all about the presents!! That is not what that time of the year is about....ok so all the traditions of Father Yule, Saint Nickolas etc etc he is handing out gifts to children and stuff...but to me it is meant to be a time for sharing and being thankful of having family and stuff around you....for being alive....but when you have someone bitching because smeone else spent more money on a present for this child and less on theres or they got more presents than this person - you start to get sick of it - especially after three years of putting up with it....and even having to put up with still expecting presents for ALL years that are in the past now...
I mean we dont give presents to all our cousins....we use to have when we were much much younger...but as we got older we stopped doing the whole birthday present thing....and to our second cousins we hardly every give anything...the odd gift in the first few years....but after that nothing...and heck as an adult there are some years where i dont get a present from all of my aunts and uncles....let alone my granparents...! So accept the fact you didnt get anything this year....or your children didnt get anything from them - they may be the same age as some of our cousins but they are of a different generation...!!
Im sitting here crying as I write this...and most people will roll there eyes and think god when isnt she cry!! Well F You....you dont understand what it is like having a mental illness now do you??? You have no idea what it is like to be walking on down through life fine and dandy on minute to be a mess the next for no reason.... im sorry officer that my brain doesnt produce the right amount of Seritonian that it is meant too!! And no Im not engesting any medication to try and fix that - much like some parents do with their ADHD or ADD children who believe they need Rediline or KIDDY COCAINE daily and then need a "top up"later that day.....dont you know your setting your child up to be a drug addict later on in life??
ANYWAY...
Im well aware of this but it has only really hit me today for some reason...that it would have been Gummi Bear's first Xmas had he survived...and so Im battling all those emotions again...where I feel like Im all alone - and I know Im not....but you just feel like you are...and I ask the whole why does so and so's baby get to live and mine didnt....or why does so and so get to be pregnant again and I cant...
And all I want right now is a hug from the person who makes it all go away knowing full well I wont get that hug....and probably will never get to see that person again...because someone has to get in the way and stop them....all I can say about them is your a a selfish control freak...Im sorry...but I know how much you hate having other people trying to control you....
I was out doing some last minute Xmas shopping last week and came across the Xmas Stocking...my mum saw me holding it...she knew what I was thinking...little things I pick up in a shop and think...awww i would have gotten that for Gummi if he was still here....
I miss him so much....though most of the time I try not to think about him....in reality I think about him every day - something will come up that will make me think of him...
I feel like Im going to stuck in this never ending cycle of grief - until something comes to full it in and fix it...I have tried believe me - to move on....to find it just doesnt work...to have it all come crashing back down on me...like how you build a tower out of lego and you get it so high and it falls back down again so you start all over agian only well same thing happens...you may have got a few more blocks on this time but it still falls down...
To end this....
I mean we dont give presents to all our cousins....we use to have when we were much much younger...but as we got older we stopped doing the whole birthday present thing....and to our second cousins we hardly every give anything...the odd gift in the first few years....but after that nothing...and heck as an adult there are some years where i dont get a present from all of my aunts and uncles....let alone my granparents...! So accept the fact you didnt get anything this year....or your children didnt get anything from them - they may be the same age as some of our cousins but they are of a different generation...!!
Im sitting here crying as I write this...and most people will roll there eyes and think god when isnt she cry!! Well F You....you dont understand what it is like having a mental illness now do you??? You have no idea what it is like to be walking on down through life fine and dandy on minute to be a mess the next for no reason.... im sorry officer that my brain doesnt produce the right amount of Seritonian that it is meant too!! And no Im not engesting any medication to try and fix that - much like some parents do with their ADHD or ADD children who believe they need Rediline or KIDDY COCAINE daily and then need a "top up"later that day.....dont you know your setting your child up to be a drug addict later on in life??
ANYWAY...
Im well aware of this but it has only really hit me today for some reason...that it would have been Gummi Bear's first Xmas had he survived...and so Im battling all those emotions again...where I feel like Im all alone - and I know Im not....but you just feel like you are...and I ask the whole why does so and so's baby get to live and mine didnt....or why does so and so get to be pregnant again and I cant...
And all I want right now is a hug from the person who makes it all go away knowing full well I wont get that hug....and probably will never get to see that person again...because someone has to get in the way and stop them....all I can say about them is your a a selfish control freak...Im sorry...but I know how much you hate having other people trying to control you....
I was out doing some last minute Xmas shopping last week and came across the Xmas Stocking...my mum saw me holding it...she knew what I was thinking...little things I pick up in a shop and think...awww i would have gotten that for Gummi if he was still here....
I miss him so much....though most of the time I try not to think about him....in reality I think about him every day - something will come up that will make me think of him...
I feel like Im going to stuck in this never ending cycle of grief - until something comes to full it in and fix it...I have tried believe me - to move on....to find it just doesnt work...to have it all come crashing back down on me...like how you build a tower out of lego and you get it so high and it falls back down again so you start all over agian only well same thing happens...you may have got a few more blocks on this time but it still falls down...
To end this....
To my little Gummi Bear
Mummy misses you everyday.
There is not a day that goes by where I dont stop and think of you.
Where I think you should be doing this by now, or I would have gotten you this toy or outfit.
I love it when you come to see me in my sleep. Those days I wish I could just stay asleep so I can be with you forever. You are the most beautiful Angel I have met. Your soft skin, warm eyes and sweet cheeky smile.
And I love you so much my sweet baby.......and I know, deep down in my heart and his, Daddy does too.
Tuesday, 23 December 2008
Secret Sant and Chocolate Willies lol
Ok so I need to seriously update this thing!! BIG TIME!! Ive been so busy with work its not funny...yes Ive had days off and all but I just dont have time to sit down and full in a blog and stuff....then its sorting out photos to put up..i want to put them all up but then it hate having to remember how to put them in a slide and all....anyway...enough of that.
Im patiently waiting to see who the new head chef will be at work since our new one only lasted a few weeks....there surely has to be someone who is strong enough to take it on and lead us all and pull us up and out of the big hole we have fallen into....I cant wait till next month when we get out gold rimmed plate for Excellence in NZ Beef and Lamb!! WOOT!! Go GPK.....!!
We have had our new menu up now for a couple of weeks...and ive gotten use to having the Excutive Chef around work alot now along with our big boss....though I tell you sometimes its hard to find something to keep yourself busy with when your realllllly slow and dead!! Even walking around the whole restaurant is a bit obvious at times.
We had a staff meeting - I love staff meetings to be honest...I usually walk away feeling good after them...and a bit more confident...we handed out our secret santa names...and gave a date for when it would be. Which is what we just did on Sunday just gone...
It was pretty fun - the day was slow and long and we all gathered in the bar had some wine and were merry and handed out presents - Aaron got Rene a blow up cow - Daisy wasnt any ordinary cow I tell you!!! Aw per the pics of us drinking outside work lol....I got cuddles with Bex's Bubba...awwwww luffs her - she is who helped me with my healing after my M/C last year...its been a rough road..but Im getting there...back on track again...I think Pam is a bit shocked at me after how I was with the boys drinking...I only had one wine and stuck to water after that....lol!!
Yaz came over last night and we had our litle handing of presents....I got her a V8 Supercar clock and she got me a Godron Ramsay book...yay we had dinner and made Chocolate Penis' for a very special person....lol boy im going to get into trouble for that...like im not in trouble for giving him a penis shape egg frier! Hahaha....but Big J does look after me well...Im now off to make more for Shannon now lol!!!
And oops just looked at the time almost time for workies!!
Works Secret Santa
My Little Xmas the Catholic School Girls Way
Im patiently waiting to see who the new head chef will be at work since our new one only lasted a few weeks....there surely has to be someone who is strong enough to take it on and lead us all and pull us up and out of the big hole we have fallen into....I cant wait till next month when we get out gold rimmed plate for Excellence in NZ Beef and Lamb!! WOOT!! Go GPK.....!!
We have had our new menu up now for a couple of weeks...and ive gotten use to having the Excutive Chef around work alot now along with our big boss....though I tell you sometimes its hard to find something to keep yourself busy with when your realllllly slow and dead!! Even walking around the whole restaurant is a bit obvious at times.
We had a staff meeting - I love staff meetings to be honest...I usually walk away feeling good after them...and a bit more confident...we handed out our secret santa names...and gave a date for when it would be. Which is what we just did on Sunday just gone...
It was pretty fun - the day was slow and long and we all gathered in the bar had some wine and were merry and handed out presents - Aaron got Rene a blow up cow - Daisy wasnt any ordinary cow I tell you!!! Aw per the pics of us drinking outside work lol....I got cuddles with Bex's Bubba...awwwww luffs her - she is who helped me with my healing after my M/C last year...its been a rough road..but Im getting there...back on track again...I think Pam is a bit shocked at me after how I was with the boys drinking...I only had one wine and stuck to water after that....lol!!
Yaz came over last night and we had our litle handing of presents....I got her a V8 Supercar clock and she got me a Godron Ramsay book...yay we had dinner and made Chocolate Penis' for a very special person....lol boy im going to get into trouble for that...like im not in trouble for giving him a penis shape egg frier! Hahaha....but Big J does look after me well...Im now off to make more for Shannon now lol!!!
And oops just looked at the time almost time for workies!!
Works Secret Santa
My Little Xmas the Catholic School Girls Way
Thursday, 11 December 2008
New uniforms, Scans and other what not..
Ok so Ive been back at work almost a week now - and I tell you its really nice to be told tha we have changed out uniforms - NOT!! I was away for almost two weeks part of that was on holiday and theo the part was because well I wasnt rostered on (gee I could have just stayed down longer lol) and so I get into work last Saturday to have one of my managers go 'White Shirt Bronwyn" and Im like wtf?? And she goes new uniform notice was up two weeks ago....Im like ummm no it wasnt and I was here Tuesday so dont give me that bullocks.....why didnt you tell me when I rang up....I thought you knew...pffft yea right....
This always happens at work I dont get told things until they are sprung on me last min and stuff....grrrr...so it was a mad dash to the Warehouse to get a new white shirt...and may i say I like this shirt i like it even more that its a size 12!!! Thats like 4 sizes down from what I usually am!! Woot!! (yet my manager still has a rant at me about how I should have my darn hair and stuff to make myself look thinner....I said gee and people wonder why i have an eating disorder relapes!!) - I dont care what she thinks, you know, I dont have customers complaining about how I look if Im too fat or too skinny....and if anything I wouldnt have half the boys at work crawlling on the floor after lol....(two of which have tried something lol) ANYWAY...
We have more new staff members and more old long term staff members leaving...and me being one of the senior staff members now - Im copping the shiat for alot of the newbies screw ups - even when Im not there it seems...and i wish my big boss would open his eyes and see that yes though he is trying to run a business as he told me like 20 million times the other night - that he is losing staff like there is a plauge or something....its all very well having staff insentives like the current one running between all outlets of the one to sell the most San Pan. and Panna Still Mineral waters, gets to stay in a hotel with a cooked buffet breakfast and big pamper and spa package and stuff....but its not doing anything because well we never win, its always head office staff that do...
This always happens at work I dont get told things until they are sprung on me last min and stuff....grrrr...so it was a mad dash to the Warehouse to get a new white shirt...and may i say I like this shirt i like it even more that its a size 12!!! Thats like 4 sizes down from what I usually am!! Woot!! (yet my manager still has a rant at me about how I should have my darn hair and stuff to make myself look thinner....I said gee and people wonder why i have an eating disorder relapes!!) - I dont care what she thinks, you know, I dont have customers complaining about how I look if Im too fat or too skinny....and if anything I wouldnt have half the boys at work crawlling on the floor after lol....(two of which have tried something lol) ANYWAY...
We have more new staff members and more old long term staff members leaving...and me being one of the senior staff members now - Im copping the shiat for alot of the newbies screw ups - even when Im not there it seems...and i wish my big boss would open his eyes and see that yes though he is trying to run a business as he told me like 20 million times the other night - that he is losing staff like there is a plauge or something....its all very well having staff insentives like the current one running between all outlets of the one to sell the most San Pan. and Panna Still Mineral waters, gets to stay in a hotel with a cooked buffet breakfast and big pamper and spa package and stuff....but its not doing anything because well we never win, its always head office staff that do...
I tell you - sometimes I wonder why i stay working there....!! Speaking of working there - I best head off now for work...
PS. I have a scan on the 22nd of December at the hospital for my Gall Bladder.
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