Fustrated

Ok I hate change - I dont cope with Change well.

So the Fiskateers site has been updated and has some big changes made to it and ive been able to get into it since they opened it back up - only I cant log in...*cries* it doesnt know my username or anything....Ive seen other people I know posting in on it but I cant get in and its not fair....but in saying that the whole thing is really confusing and hard to find things. There is to much on there, and the front page's HTML is all screwed up and yea lol.

Tomorrow Im going to my friend Claire's - our friend Julia is coming over and we are all going to have a little crop day...though Im like no in the mood to be dragging all my stuff around and yea...I wish I had one of those wheelie tote bags - I have a shoulder on and a hand one for my tools and stuff...but when youve got a cuttlebug and couple of albums you like to show off...its hard - and my little plastic cube is overly pratical - and lets say Winter isnt a fun time for cropping - when the weather is yucky...

Next week on Friday I have Crop Night at Scrappin Downunder - boy I havent been to one there for a while....with them all being booked up and stuff... :S Must check with when the nights are and if im booked in for them.

Last night my puppy Abby graduated from the 8 week Domestic Obediance Behaviour class we were doing. Ive been advise to wait a couple of weeks before bringing her back - then we will probably start on the Companion class or maybe the Obediance Comp Level 1 class....dont know yet. But Ive been advise to wait also till she is about 18 months old or so before starting agility - I tell you Im going to have to work hard with her training and obediance first though in order to do the agility - I hate the winter its horrible I dont like going for walks with her. And with work and my insomnia its hard getting out for walks to do my heel work...but yea...

I got an outfit for my Manager's baby she is due with next month and a shawl and a photo frame....I would love to get a plan gift page and jazz it up a bit to match the card I made...lol to put everything in. Im not sure when she goes on Maternity leave though...I think in a couple of weeks. I didnt get on with this manager when I first started - probably because of the fact that after I lost my baby I locked myself away from the world, I couldnt be around pregnant ladies or babies...I had a friend who had a baby and I remember the day I was handed this baby to hold I burst into tears and had to hand her back. I was ok watching her and playing with her...tickling her feet and stuff but holding was to hard - but I managed to hold her one day with no tears - maybe it was because i had my niece there with me that day....and my niece is the best - at 5 yrs of age I can turn to her and talk to her about anything. She's my mini me - my baby girl...my world and the apple of my eye...so when I started my new job and noticed one of the managers was pregnant it was hard - we seemed to be at each others throat alot - sometimes I use to think it was the clashing on the Welsh Blood in us....it was even worse when i had a meeting with her and the HR manager who was pregnant....and made me feel reallllly stink about losing my baby and stuff....but somehow me and my manager on mothers day got on well, and from there we have been fine since. Giving this gift is just another step into my path of healing and greiving...

I have a plan for Friday, I hope the weather is fine - I was going to do this on my Poppa's bday which would have been my baby's due date only my car broke down on my just as i got home with it from the workshop lol. If the weather is fine Im going to head over to Mt Eden and pick up one of my mates - if I cant get him I might get someone else...and there is something I want to do, and I have a page planned for in my mini memorial album.

2 Days till my 22nd Birthday. 8 days till my puppy Abby's 1st Birthday.